Ruth: Do we have grandchildren?
Bert: Oh no. You are slipping away from me. How could this happen so ...
Ruth: Be quiet you old ...
Bert: Well, what kind of question is that? Of course we have grandchildren.
Ruth: Really? Where are they?
Bert: Do you want exact locations or ...
Ruth: Will you be quiet.
Bert: You keep asking me dumb questions.
Ruth: And you keep giving me even dumber answers.
Bert: Why don't you get to the point. You and I may not have enough years left to beat around this particular bush.
Ruth: Do you remember when they used to call us every day? They thought you and I were the greatest thing in the world. They would run into our arms every single time we saw them.
Bert: If they ran into our arms now, we'd fall to the ground.
Ruth: You know what I'm talking about. They never call anymore. They never come over anymore. We have grandchildren less than a mile away from this house. Yet we never see them unless they're brought here against their will.
Bert: It is not against their will.
Ruth: Oh, yes it is. They came over here for our anniversary. Charlotte would not get off her cell phone and she kept bugging her mother to let her go out with her boyfriend rather than be here.
Bert: They do have lives. I'm sure if she truly didn't want to be here, they would not have made her come along.
Ruth: Really? Do you remember when we dragged Joseph to your parents house? We did it on more than one occasion.
Bert: We didn't drag Joseph anywhere.
Ruth: If you only knew. I don't know how many times Joey came to me saying "Mom, don;t make me ...", "Mom I don't want to go.", "Mom, Grandma smells bad and Grandpa smells worse."
Bert: Get off of it Ruth.
Ruth: It's true.
Bert: Then, are you not being hypocritical by saying that Charlotte was forced to be here. You supposedly made Joseph go places. How can you complain that Charlotte is made to come here?
Ruth: I see the error of my ways! I should not have made Jospeh do anything he didn't want to do.
Bert: Fair enough.
Ruth: But most of all, I can't figure out why she wouldn't want to come here.
Bert: Maybe we smell.
Ruth: We?
Bert: Funny.
Ruth: I'm calling Charlotte.
Bert: What for?
Ruth: I'm going to make her want to visit us.
Bert: How are you planning on doing that?
Ruth: Shut up. It's ringing.
Bert: This should be good.
Ruth: Hello? Charolotte? Hello sweetheart. It's Grandma. ... I'm doing good. How about you? ... Great. Sweetie, when is the last time you saw your grandfather? ... Really? That long? ... Did you tell him you loved him? ... You don't know? ... You don't think you did? ... Oh, sweetie. Your grandfather just died. Bet you wish you said you loved him now. ...
